Just one ordinary mom , just one ordinary day

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when the going get tough

Sometimes when the going gets tough we just have to suck it up and put our our big girl panties.
Yup there I said it .
recently there has been a tough situation in our family . I am not going to bore you with all the nitty gritty details but one thing I have learned is that if I can’t change it I can choose how i react to it .
Things have sucked. I am not going to lie. I literally have felt like i want to crawl into a hole with a blanket and a good book and just get lost. Unfortunately for me that’s not an option.
So i am choosing to put on my big girl panties. I will get through this no matter what it takes. Part of that is learning to let those around me help instead of taking it all on myself. I am very much a do it myself person. I am probably one of the most stubborn and determined person you could ever meet. Tell me I can’t and ill show you i can . Asking for help is like swallowing a bitter pill that get caught in your throat and leaves an aftertaste that lingers for days.
So i did ask for help . I was pleasantly surprised at the willingness of those around me . I had to open my mind to a new possibility and opened myself up to a new kind of love. Those who have helped are generous with their time and love . Not offering judgement but an acceptance.
The second thing Ive learned is acceptance. To accept that i am not super woman. Even though i am always armed with my superwoman pj’s i am not. I’d like to think that I am but I am not. I had to learn to accept that i am not always right, That change is not always a bad thing, That by allowing myself to be venerable I can learn that much more from those around me.
Third i’ve learned that expressing emotions is ok. I am not generally a person who cries. It’s not that i believe in some sadistic thinking that it’s only for the weak but that when i cry it shows how i truly feel. I like people to think that i have it all together. I felt that if I cry then I show people that I am a mess. I’ve built up the emotional walls so that i can turn things off and on like a light switch. I’ve had to learn how to tear those walls down and allow myself to feel things that scare me. I know how to show several emotions and that is it, Happy , Angry, Annoyed and sarcasm. Sarcasm being my go to . When I am hurt i tend to make snarky sarcastic remarks, When i am unsure how to react I turn to sarcastic humour. When i am scared i turn again to snarky sarcastic remarks. Yup you guessed it am a very Sarcastic person.
I have had to learn to turn the sarcasm off and express to others with a genuine response. Wow has that ever been hard. I have had to learn that it’s ok to cry . It’s alright to admit that i am scared . It’s alright to tell someone that you aren’t sure how you feel .
So When the going get’s tough put on your big girl panties and allow yourself these three things. I promise you that it’s not going to be easy but it’s going to be worth it .

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